cheap chianti
It’s really not bad. Sluggable, in fact. I was walking back to the kitchen every so often to refill my glass, but finally I just brought the raffia-covered jug in and set it by my keyboard.
My child’s at ballet with her Daddy, and the veggies for Roasted Mediterranean Vegetable Lasagne are roasted and cooling.
Girls.
I am ready to take smoking back up, quit healing school, quit my job, take my child out of ballet, and kiss my husband’s ass from here until eternity so I can just stay home and quilt and clean and cook and shop. After all, he may not be much of a maid, but he is very nice about watching the baby or babies for me so I can get some ‘me’ time.
The only thing keeping me from putting pink rollers in my hair, putting on stretch pants and high heels, and lighting up a cig is that I just don’t have any cigs right now. And it’s for the best… I’d like to try hard to cope without my addiction– just this once???
I wonder how long it will take me to sink back into the negative pleasure of being my Alabama WT self.
And I’ve spent waaaaay too much money on healing school to throw it over now. Not yet, anyway.
Also.
While natural family planning appears to have worked out okay for me this month [at least that's some good news, right? some pretty serious good news, in fact], the particular brand of natural deodorant I have doesn’t appear to be doing the same. I am terribly paranoid– Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean you *don’t* smell bad. Was someone skipping away from me as subtly as possible today in our staff meeting?
[The staff meeting in which I found out I am now reporting to the most machiavellian, manipulative, twisted MF I've ever known? Sigh. I'm going to try hard to keep my mind clear and be professional and give him the opportunity to do the same. It's possible that it will be just fine. But I've been enjoying the freedom to schedule my work as I saw fit, working extra long days in the field and taking comp time when needed to keep my life together. I desperately need some now, for sure.]
I’ll go research other brands, perhaps the crystal brand my hotwaterbath friend recommends. Or maybe just cave to patchouli. And M. hotwaterbath, you can ask me for granola, or tease me in any other way you please, any time.
The weekend is coming. I can’t wait. My husband, who is a good enough guy at the moment, will be gone, so it will be an all girl party– call me if you want to hang out.
I want so badly just to hibernate and ground myself, even if it’s in things that don’t last such as my house and possessions, even if it’s in things that are pretty much purely academic and cerebral and unreal, such as self help books or delicious highmiddlebrow fiction, even if it’s in ‘giving too much’ as I slave to plan my long dreamed of Friday the Thirteenth birthday party (That’s not my birthday but it’s close enough!).
Soon. The weekend will be here soon.
I better go whip up that pain in the ass white sauce and put the ’sagna together.
M's husband said,
September 29, 2006 at 7:51 am
Don’t worry about smelling. Well, don’t worry about me worrying about it anyway. I kind of like “eau de actual human.” And mixed with some good hippy smell like tea-tree oil or patchouli? Hey it’s all good. I’m assuming that you’d probably take a shower before going somewhere if you’d worked up some serious funk by mowing the lawn or something.
I won’t tease you about stinking if you don’t tease me about the wretched looking sores on my right arm that are either galloping ringworm or the bubonic plague.
M said,
September 29, 2006 at 7:52 am
Don’t worry about smelling. Well, don’t worry about me worrying about it anyway. I kind of like “eau de actual human.” And mixed with some good hippy smell like tea-tree oil or patchouli? Hey it’s all good. I’m assuming that you’d probably take a shower before going somewhere if you’d worked up some serious funk by mowing the lawn or something.
I won’t tease you about stinking if you don’t tease me about the wretched looking sores on my right arm that are either galloping ringworm or the bubonic plague.
M said,
September 29, 2006 at 7:52 am
Oh lord. The previous was me. Not W.
shaky said,
October 1, 2006 at 8:40 am
M, please don’t get me started about ringworm. We have a great affinity for problems with yeast/fungus in my family, something to do with diabetic and autoimmune issues. I know i’ve crost many TMI frontiers on this blog, but I hadn’t got to that one yet. I was too ashamed. My legs get COVERED. And one of my dearest friends just told me the other day that ringworm is a real worm!!!!! a really smart friend, too. It’s one of the reasons I am doing Natural Family Planning. Nothing gets rid of it except heavy duty acidophilus or other supplement. And stopping birth control pills which, the best I can guess, are immune suppressors much like pregnancy. And, of course, eating less carbs and sugar… but that is just not an option. If it looks like, well, like a raised roundish ring, it’s ringworm. If it doesn’t, well, I guess it’s bubonic plague!! And I won’t tease!
shaky said,
October 1, 2006 at 8:41 am
oh. and by the way. It’s not catching. mine isn’t, anyway. some times you can get it from, say, the fur of your dogs, or kids get it from other kids… but nobody but me ever gets mine. And I haven’t seen you in a while so I sure didn’t give it to you.